Monday was birthday day-- I had taken the day off from work, Brenna had plans to visit the zoo and eat lunch at Olive Garden and Sam would choose dinner and have friends overnight. Then everything changed. Somehow between Friday and Monday, everything looked different. As last week progressed, I hesitated to invite friends to a sleepover and we decided to wait. Then the zoo trip transitioned from St. Louis to Bloomington before landing at "maybe in a few weeks when the weather is warmer..."
Ugh. I felt like a failure as a mom. Birthdays are supposed to be special, YOUR DAY, with special food, fun outings and friends. It's not supposed to involve homemade pizza and mom working the majority of the day. But here's the deal- it is what it is.
So, we shifted gears. Brenna chose pizza, Sam didn't care about food at all and after dinner concluded, we had cake and ice cream. Brenna's request for the evening was that we all play games. I hadn't played charades in a long time. I hadn't played hide and go seek even longer. But as we just acted silly and rolled with it, phones were set aside. Media was ignored and the "off kilter" feeling began to wane.
A good friend has said many times, "Expectations aren't good or bad. They just are." I tend to carry around expectations that I am not even aware of-- that my work schedule won't change, that my lifestyle can continue without interruption, that I will be able to find ground beef for taco night on a whim. When that expectation goes unmet-- off kilter.
Sometimes to counter balance off kilter, it requires doing something unexpected and out of the norm. Whether it's a random act of kindness, hiding rocks in the neighborhood, eating lunch on the patio or walking by the lake-- even if you don't "feel like it", just spin yourself silly by doing something new and unexpected today. It might actually make you feel more grounded instead of simply dizzy.
